Being a parent does not come with an instruction manual. It is grueling, exhausting and sometimes thankless work, but the benefits far outweigh the difficulties. When raising children, there are a few tricks of the trade that experienced parents cling to with all their might. The blunders we make are gaffe’s that we can all learn from and in an age where instant digital content allows the sharing of minds, what better time to take advantage of the guidance and assistance of parents who have already gone through it. Why not learn from our mistakes?
The Key to Successful Parenting
The key to learning as we trudge forward is that this too shall pass. Long-term victories are significant, and it is important to remember that children grown and change. What works at age 5 won’t work at age 15. What triggers a screaming fit at 7 won’t prompt the same response at 18. As our children grow, we grow with them. The following 5 parental mistakes are presented for your reading pleasure. Learn from them as I did and stand up, hold your chin high and cut yourself some slack.
Currently we have an army of entitled children. Advanced technology has programed them to expect instantaneous gratification and patience has become a thing of the past. Sadly, much of this is our fault. We want our kids to have more. We wipe out consequence in fear that we are being too demanding. We coddle and fuss when we don’t think the same opportunity has been afforded to them and in turn, we have taught our kiddos that lackadaisical attitude is alright. Our homes have become child-centered where suitable becomes definitive and in-turn have promoted selfishness over selflessness.
2. Making our Children our BFF’s
We want our children to trust us. We want them to come to us and confide in us, but there is a thin line between the role of the parent and the role of the child. When we attempt to relate to our children as equals, we wipe out the authority we have as parents. This is a confusing realm for our kids. Parents should not seek for approval in their children. This role only leads to permissiveness and desperation on the part of the parent. Creating the friendship role with children leads to a narrow slope of reverse approval.
3. Rearing the Child you Want, Not the Child you Already Have
Each child has a diverse set of amazing traits and characteristics. As parents, we need to learn to embrace these features and cultivate them instead of attempting to promote personalities and strengths we believe they should have. Love the child you have and be content with their unique set of gifts.
4. Do as I Say, Not as I Do
Whether we like to admit it or not, kids are always watching. Remember that being an example with your actions carries the real weight. If we expect our children to behave a certain with specific morals and ethics, we must emulate those ideals in front of them every single day.
5. I Don’t Want to Miss a Thing
The minutes of life pass quickly. One day they are in diapers learning to walk, the next day they are graduating from college and moving into their own place. Have the presence of mind to cherish the small stuff. Remember the giggles. Treasure the hugs and the butterfly kisses. Don’t rush it. Even the temper tantrums will carry bittersweet memoirs.
Don’t Sweat the Mistakes.
As parents, we all make mistakes. Some of us make more than others, but the ability to learn from one another and the aptitude to keep pressing on even when we feel like failures is vital to our success and the final achievements of our children. You can do this, and our mistakes are simply opportunities to redirect and press forward with renewed acuity and another notch on our collective parental sash.
This is a guest post written Erica Johnson of by of InnerParents.